BIG hits the shelves in Canada

What a whirlwind week! I arrived home on Wednesday to find my pre-order copies of BIG: Stories About Life in Plus-Sized Bodies had arrived.

Even the Table of Contents is pretty!

Opening the box was surreal. Packs of five books were each plastic-wrapped together, preserving that fresh book smell. The cover is silky smooth and the vibrant colours pop off the page. It is simply a thing o’ beauty.

Caitlin Press Editor Christina Myers has amassed some incredible essays that lay bare the experience of living large in a society obsessed with small.

These stories offer a closer look at what it means to navigate a world designed to fit bodies of a certain size (sometimes literally) and, in turn, invite readers to ask questions about — and ultimately reconsider — our collective and individual obsession with women’s bodies.

There’s promotions planned in the near future, and I know I have more to say on this topic, but let’s cut to the chase on what really matters.

Get your copy now

My husband was just as excited as I was to see this on Page 16.

Today is the official release date for the anthology. Purchase a copy from one of the Okanagan’s best independent bookstores, Mosaic Books.

I’m also a fan of Wendel’s in Langley. They have some copies and you can also order online.

Or you can order it directly from Caitlin Press themselves.

Do you live in the U.S.? Order a copy from Powell’s. Have you ever been? If you’re ever in Portland, GO. It was a spiritual experience.

I’m a fan of supporting independents, but I get that sometimes you gotta go big to get BIG. Here’s some links to pave the way:

Have questions or wondering about readings? Feel free to hit me up.

Finding Your Cape released and now a bestseller

Happy crowd of Mareathoners at Saturday’s book launch celebration.

All that work, reading, revising, mental energy, worry, tears, contemplation just emerged into the world as an incredible book that people are buying and reading.

Mare McHale is the best-selling author of Finding Your Cape.
Me and best-selling author, Mare McHale.

It was an honour to help Mare McHale edit Finding Your Cape: How to Course Correct and Achieve Greatness When Things Don’t Go As Planned. I know the book will help so many people – it features honesty that we don’t see much of in the world. But this makes such a strong argument for being authentic and staying true to yourself.

I’m still amazed at Mare’s strength, resiliency and vulnerability, enduring so much and also recognizing how her struggles can, and will, help others.

The book launch was packed – and the vibe in the room was so positive and celebratory. The early reviews are in (from media like News 1130, AM 1150, Castanet and Penticton Herald), and her publication was also ranked #1 in new releases, grief, mental health, happiness and textbooks on Amazon over the weekend.

There is a lot more to come from Mare on this topic and more. Looking forward to seeing this newly minted author fly to incredible heights.

If you would like to purchase a copy (and highly recommend you do!), visit the link on Amazon.

When a book editor works with a YouTuber

The thing about being a freelance editor is you can’t see the all the reactions your writer has during the highs and lows of the editing process.

I always try to be kind. You can be a ruthless editor without making someone feel like they’ve been run down by a speeding pickup with studded tires. I do my best to FaceTime or Skype my clients during the “low points” of the process, so that all my words are delivered sensitively. I can see their reaction, anticipate their concern or frustration, and try to alleviate their fears. When you’re in the weeds of the editing process, it can be a dark time for a writer — the moment they want to throw the work in a bin and light a match. Not one single writer needs fuel for those flames of self-doubt.

I spend a lot of time hand-holding through the low valleys, but usually we are done before they reach the very peak of the mountain — when they read positive feedback and are floating above the ground with happiness. Or most importantly, that last 10% of the climb they must face alone.

Gotta love that post-delivery glow

That experience has been true for me, until I worked with Mare McHale. She records the entire moment with her video camera — including when FedEx comes to her front door with four very heavy boxes holding no less than 200 books.

You get to hear the squeals of excitement. You see the sparkle in her eyes. That’s when the editor gets to climb the mountain peak too… I actually fell off my chair laughing so hard at her reaction, there was so. much. joy.

Then she unpacks all those lovely books in preparation for mailing out the pre-orders she received. Taking in the magnitude of her achievement, she starts crying in her kitchen and thanking people for believing in her, championing her on, and supporting her on the journey. And then you start crying, too.

Her book will be released on Jan. 23, and she has a special book launch celebration set for Jan. 25. (Tickets can be purchased here. Don’t wait – tickets are going quickly) In the meantime, she has several media interviews scheduled, as interest in the subject of mental health and the woman whose light is helping others find their way out of darkness grows.

I cannot wait for the celebration, when I can offer a toast to her achievement and soak in her joy — all in person.

A heavy load

Being a service member is not easy — those men and women shoulder an incredible load.

But how do you tell that story in a compelling way that resonates with civilians? How do you make annual Remembrance Day stories real to those who will never see the realities of military service?  The Royal British Legion put together this brilliant video for #ArmedForcesDay. Such a simple concept, and beautifully executed.

Each civilian is introduced by name and profession, personalizing them and making the individual relatable. The viewer walks through the civilian experience of loading the bag and trying to lift it.

How telling stories makes us human

As this story by Jeffrey Kluger explains in Time Magazine, stories are part of who we are and the communities we live in. Sharing good stories can positively impact people’s perceptions and interactions with you.

Odds are, you’ve never heard the story of the wild pig and the seacow — but if you’d heard it, you’d be unlikely to forget it. The wild pig and seacow were best friends who enjoyed racing each other for sport. One day, however, the seacow hurt his legs and could run no more. So the wild pig carried him down to the sea, where they could race forever, side by side, one in the water, one on the land.You can learn a lot from a tale like that — about friendship, cooperation, empathy and an aversion to inequality. And if you were a child in the Agta community — a hunter-gatherer population in The Philippines’ Isabela Province — you’d have grown up on the story, and on many others that teach similar lessons. The Agta are hardly the only peoples who practice storytelling; the custom has been ubiquitous in all cultures over all eras in all parts of the world. Now, a new study in Nature Communications, helps explain why: storytelling is a powerful means of fostering social cooperation and teaching social norms, and it pays valuable dividends to the storytellers themselves, improving their chances of being chosen as social partners, receiving community support and even having healthy offspring. Read the full story: http://time.com/5043166/storytelling-evolution/

Stories have been part of human history since the beginning — and research has shown that storytellers can benefit from sharing tales.

In print: essay chosen for BIG anthology

Thrilled to share that my essay “Easy Out” has been selected for publication in BIG: Stories about Life in Plus-Sized Bodies – an anthology to be published next year.

Editor Christina Myers has curated a collection of essays and poetry that plumb the depths of size, and the experience “of being large in a a culture obsessed with thinness.”

The second I read the call for submissions, I knew what experience I would share. Talk about getting vulnerable: this essay touches on my past identity as an athlete, and how it ran up against the health-care system in a difficult moment that I struggled to even disclose to friends and family. It was a devastating and isolating experience. Having worked with Christina in the past, and read her brave and bold words in previously published work, I knew my story would be safe in her hands. There is work from 26 other writers in this anthology, and I cannot wait to read each and every piece, to shed the isolation and share in the experience of so many others.

BIG: Stories about Life in Plus-Size Bodies will be published by Caitlin Press in early 2020. Check out the catalogue online.

What I’m reading: Split Tooth

Cover of Tanya Tagaq's novel, Split Tooth.

I used to be the type of person who could only read one thing at a time. No cacaphony of narrative voice – give the author the due respect they deserve! But as a Lit major, solitary focus on one novel is a luxury you just cannot afford. I tried to revert back to my monogamous reading style, but evidently I’m averse to commitment. I tell myself it’s okay: this scattered, read-all-the-things approach means I’m always surrounded by books.

I just finished reading Tanya Tagaq’s Split Tooth. What an incredible read – experimental, yet evocative of traditional mythology and Indigenous creationist tales. It isn’t very often that you read something that feels like it is breaking ground in terms of form and style. The story offers a raw and unflinching glimpse into life in Nunavut, and there were several times my heart broke in two for the young female narrator, or I had to put the book down. The definition of a haunting tale.

Secret’s out… Mare wrote a book!

Super happy to share today’s news… Mare McHale is writing a book!

That’s right: the CEO of Redhead Mare Media, radio announcer and frontrunner of the Mareathon has been spending some quality time at the keyboard these last few months, in an effort to tell her story. I’m proud to say I am playing a small part in this project supporting Mare through the writing process as an editor and cheerleader.

She posted a video last year about her speaking engagement and how it was the start of a book. It hit me like a ton of bricks, that I was going to help her with this project. I sent her a note suggesting we meet, because I knew she had a book inside of her and I could help get it out of her head and on the page. When we chatted over lunch, she confessed that she didn’t know where to start. And so we began with me supporting her as a writing coach, cheerleader and editor, coaxing her words onto the page. I’m really excited for her!

 Check out her vlog announcing the project:

I love, love, love how thrilled she is. On Friday I delivered the hard copy of the working manuscript to her, and she was beaming. This has been a tough one to keep under wraps, so when Mare said she was announcing the project, I was excited and very relieved!

If you don’t who Mare is, I recommend you check out her YouTube channel and website. Her official bio reads like someone who is in serious need of a vacation. 

Mare is a Canadian YouTuber and radio announcer, sharing her journey in daily vlogs. She created the Mareathoner community on Facebook, to ensure others feel less alone. She’s a strong woman with a strong brand encouraging women to take care of themselves. Mare is an advocate for mental health, women’s health and special needs. She has a son, Thomas, who is deaf & Autistic; she’s determined to help him & educate others by example. In June of 2017 Mare’s husband Jeremy took his life after battling depression and anxiety for years. This tragedy spurred Mare to be vulnerable and honest about her journey, with the hopes of helping others.

I have to say, the woman behind the bio is truly incredible and I am so proud to call her my friend. I struggle to find the words to describe how much she has inspired me, and it is humbling to be there for her during this project, which I know will make a big difference in the lives of many.

So stay tuned as this project unfolds – this is a book you won’t want to miss.

The tale of fear

This being Halloween, I find myself pondering the tension between the value and ethical challenge of fear in stories. Fear comes first, before fight-or-flight. It prompts reaction. It can be entertainment that people crave, evidenced through the billion-dollar industry that produces films in horror genres like suspense, gore, slasher, thriller, psychological and possession. We line up outside of haunted houses to satisfy the rush. Fear is a strong emotion that can drive people’s decisions. This storytelling approach is valuable when it comes to inspiring people to consider the implications of their current behaviour. Public health campaigns are a great example of this. People often avoid, consciously or unconsciously, thinking about what health effects they could experience as a result of choices like drug use. The Visual Communication Guy showcased a few successful campaigns that successfully deploy graphic images designed to illicit the Fear Appeal. The gore and in-your-face approach forces people to face that fear, and consider changing to alternatives. (Side note: the teeth = ew.) But there are ethical challenges around this. The Poynter Institute identified that in a crowded media market, traditional and new media outlets are deploying fear tactics to build and keep audiences.
The more stimuli there are competing for your consideration, the more that attention seekers must fight to incentivize you to look their way. More often than not, this results in psychological warfare as attention-seekers leverage any and all emotions to draw people in.
That psychological warfare is an apt term for what can be seen in beauty campaigns, playing off women’s worst fears around their appearance. Or stories about men who do not exhibit the stereotypical physical strength, and this being an inherent character flaw to be avoided. And pretty much anything under the sun involving politics. It is powerful tool, and one to be used mindfully — making sure you are not afraid to face yourself the morning after.

Award winner: Searching for Sidney

The following story won the Neville Shanks Memorial Silver Award for Historical Writing, from the B.C.-Yukon Community Newspaper Association in 2006. It was originally published in the Coquitlam Now on Nov. 11, 2005.

Searching for Sidney: Closure for family comes in Holland

Geoff Peterson remembers when he first learned the name of RCAF Flying Officer Sidney Peterson. He was seven and playing in his grandfather’s house. He paused to look up at two black and white photographs on the wall.

“I remember asking my grandpa who these people were,” Peterson says, “and I remember that he explained that they were my dad’s brothers who gave their lives so we could be free.”

Peterson’s father, Roy, would also recount each Remembrance Day how he had looked up to his older brother, Sidney, and that the family never really knew what had happened — aside from the government letter that stated Sidney’s RAF Halifax bomber LV905 was shot down in Holland in May of 1944. Roy had travelled to the Commonwealth War Graves cemetery in Jonkerbos, in the Dutch city of Nijmegen, when he was 20, to pay his respects to his brother. The Netherlands’ front line town cemetery was where two bodies from Sidney’s seven-man crew were buried, after being moved in 1953 from a local cemetery.

Flying Officer Sidney Peterson. Image courtesy Veterans Affairs Canada.

This was all Peterson, a Coquitlam resident, knew about Sidney — until four years ago.

Peterson’s father was contacted by the daughter of one of the crew members, who in turn put him in contact with a former army sergeant and a website devoted to the crash of the LV905 – detailing not only crew members and witness accounts from the day the Halifax crashed, but outlining the grassroots effort by a local man to spur the powers that be into conducting a salvage operation for the plane and its crew.

The man, Anton van der Plujm, was 16 at the time of the crash. He was walking to work in the early morning, following the LV905’s path as it returned from a bombing raid. The Germans had roped him into clearing the wreckage from the road, which included the rear section of the Halifax; the plane broke in two when it hit a dike beside a creek running through a field. The front came to rest in the marshy field.

“The thing was that the plane crashed and, because of the dike system they have there, it sank,” Peterson says. “Within a day or two days, it was completely submerged.”

The plane’s fuselage may have been out of sight, but it wasn’t out of van der Plujm’s mind. He became a thorn in the side of the municipal council of Hank, insistent that the villagers owed the crew a debt of honour in recovering their remains and giving them a proper burial. A plaque was erected in 2001, but van der Plujm refused to be placated. He wrote a letter to the late Prince Bernhard, the former Dutch prince consort who was also a war hero, and shortly thereafter, a foundation charged with the task of recovering the Halifax LV905 was created.

Permission from Hank council had to be granted before the salvage operation could take place in the Orange Field, which was by then farmland plowed every year. The politicians expressed concerns over cost and whether it was appropriate to disturb the crew’s remains. An international letter-writing campaign began to pressure council members to vote in favour of excavating the Halifax, and with a slim 11-10 majority, the salvage operation was approved last year.

After a year of preparations, Peterson and his father and brother travelled to Hank in September, determined to be there as the machines turned over the first piles of earth.

“The operation meant a lot to the family and especially my dad,” Peterson says, “because my dad looked up to him (Sidney) as a kid … It was so shocking to find out that maybe there was a possibility that the remains of all the crew could be found.

“Closure for my dad is a big thing. All these years of knowing that partial remains may have been found, but not knowing how much or where, has been tough.”

Even before they had left Canadian soil, the Dutch were intent on showing the Petersons their trademark hospitality. When they checked in for their KLM flight, the airline staff had found out the reason behind the family’s trek and bumped them up to first-class seats. Arriving in Amsterdam, Peterson said they grabbed their bags and, even before checking into their hotel, drove straight to the crash site.

“We wanted to go there because it was the day before the dig was to officially open,” he says, “so we wanted to have a moment to ourselves before the crowds got there.”

The family woke up early the next day and travelled to the town of Hank, just outside the Orange Field. The entire town’s population was filing out of their homes and making their way to the crash site.

“We get to Hank, and nothing’s changed in 60 years. It’s an old little village, a beautiful little place,” Peterson says, “and when we pulled in, the difference we saw from the day before was there were hundreds of people on their little bicycles coming out of all the driveways, out of all the houses, and riding this mile and a half to the crash site. “It was a huge deal in their town, and all the people came out to see it.”

Villagers joined the Petersons at the field, where the memorial plaque had been erected. As they were waiting for the speeches to begin, members of a Scottish pipe band that had been competing at a Highland Games a few fields away approached the Petersons to say that Dutch pipers had heard about the dig to take place — and wanted to play in a procession to mark the occasion.

“Three of the pipe bands at the games wanted to get together as one band and walk as they were playing as a memorial to the crew,” he says. After the band played, the mayor of Hank gave a speech and a little ceremony finished, the Petersons were swarmed by Dutch people and the international press.

“There were people there from all sorts of other villages who just wanted to come and talk to us, the family, and thank us for our family’s contribution to their liberation,” he recalls. “They were very thankful. The hospitality the Dutch have for Canadians is amazing.”

While the superstar status he and his family enjoyed that day was incredible, Peterson says he was more overcome by physically being at the crash site.

“It’s kind of overwhelming,” he explains of his thoughts during the ceremony. “For never getting to meet someone like my uncle, and only knowing his photograph, to being a few feet from where he is buried – the place he was breathing for the last time – it was amazing.”

And with every pile of earth dug up and turned over, Peterson says he grew closer and closer to his uncle. A pocket watch made in Canada in 1941 was found among the debris – a requisite device carried by navigators in the day, as the plane’s instruments couldn’t be trusted during bombing raids, as the cabin pressure in elevation would distort the time. The arms of the pocket watch, which had been perfectly preserved in the soil, were frozen at the exact time of the crew’s death.

But the pocket watch wasn’t the only item recovered. Because the plane sank into a bed of clay, it and all the contents had been protected from air and subsequent oxidization. “They were pulling bullets out that were shiny, like brand new,” Peterson says, recalling how he thought he had grabbed a bullet in a mound of earth, but pulled out an entire round of ammunition on a belt.  “The aluminum they were pulling out, it was like new. It was like a time capsule.”

The bodies of the crew, however, didn’t fare as well in the clay. So far, excavators have recovered only bone fragments in different areas. The families still don’t know whose remains have been found, or where or how much. Peterson says they anticipate having to do DNA testing to confirm exactly who the remains belonged to.

“The thing is that my other uncle, Laurie, was shot down in South Africa, and all they knew was that the plane was shot out of the sky and nothing was ever found,” Peterson says. “To find some information about one of my uncles is great, and finding his remains would be even better. We’ll see I guess.”

The Petersons intend to return to the crash site next year when the dig will be completed and all the DNA findings will be received. But for the 35-year-old man from Coquitlam, the experience so far has deepened his already profound respect for those who sacrificed their lives for freedom.

“The trip meant a lot to me, and my brother as well,” he says. “I’d say most people our age don’t really understand the meaning behind Remembrance Day, or sacrifice, or war. It’s tough to blame them, people my age were brought up not knowing any different.

“My dad is the youngest of five in his family, and I’m the youngest of five in my family – so that puts 60 years between what happened and the age I’m at now.

“I don’t think people my age understand what happened, because their families are a bit younger, and most people today don’t have first-hand experience with the war.”